A Review of Church Discipline
6/14/1998
GRM 575
Matthew 18:15-19
Transcript
GRM 5756/14/1998
A Review of Church Discipline
Matthew 18:15-19
Gil Rugh
I want to direct your attention to the gospel of Matthew, this evening, and the 18th chapter. I’ll look into the word of God with you on the matter of what we call church discipline and just highlight the procedure that the scripture sets out regarding the discipline that we exercise among ourselves as God’s people. We’re going to be highlighting this. There have been other times when we’ve done more detailed studies, and you can get the tapes where there will be a fuller explanation. We also have a booklet that covers this material, “Church Discipline, an Evidence of Love.”
We live in a day when the concept of discipline has greatly eroded. We’re not to do anything that would cause anyone discomfort or pain, no matter what they do. Proverbs, chapter 13, verse 24 says, “He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently.” The Bible does indicate that discipline is an evidence of love. That you care enough for this person, in the context of Proverbs 13:24 “your son,” to go to the trouble of disciplining him and disciplining him diligently. If you don’t discipline him diligently, it’s an evidence of a lack of love as a parent.
So we need to put this in perspective of what God says. As the scripture indicates in the book of Hebrews, all discipline is unpleasant. We want to come up with forms of discipline that will not cause any discomfort, that will not be painful, that will not cause any bad feelings. But, you know, if it doesn’t hurt, in one way or another, it’s not really discipline. If my dad said to me, “Oh, you didn’t do your homework so you got a ‘D’? I want you to go down to the corner and order a hot fudge sundae.” We wouldn’t call it disciplining, would we? Because there’s nothing unpleasant about that. I assure you he never said that.
Well, in Matthew, chapter 18, in the context, and we don’t have time to go into detail in the context of showing God’s love and concern for every believer, He brings up the subject of discipline. So we’re just going to pick up with verse 15, where Christ says, “And if your brother sins.” It flows out of the context, God, your heavenly Father, that it’s not His will that one of these little ones should perish. All those that He calls to Himself are under His care. Part of His care as a loving, heavenly Father is the exercising of discipline in His family. We as His Church are part of that family and we are to be involved in the demonstrating of God’s love and His love is manifest in us and through us for one another in a proper procedure of discipline.
So, we’ll walk through the steps here, beginning with verse 15, “And if your brother sins, go and reprove him in private. If he listens to you, you have won your brother.” We’re in the context now within the family of believers. A fellow believer sins. Some manuscripts say, “sins against you.” The better manuscripts of Matthew don’t have that here, although in Luke 17:4, on another occasion, Christ did use that expression of one is sinning against you. But here, however, if a Christian sins against you or you do become aware personally of sin in his life, you go and reprove him in private. It doesn’t say what the sin is, but we’re dealing with sin here. It’s not, that, well, your brother doesn’t dress the way you like or does something that is a matter of personal preference, but you don’t care for it. It’s not the kind of thing. We’re talking about sin here. He has sinned against God. Violated God’s will for Him. “You go and reprove him in private.” You jump down to verse 21, Peter has some questions here about a brother sinning against him and how often should he forgive him, which seems to put this in the context. One of the prime ways you may become aware of it, is a sin you have experienced the brunt of.
But, at any rate, you go and reprove him in private. Now, I want you to note here, that is given as a command by Christ. It is an imperative in form. It is something that He commands you to do. Now, that’s important because if I become aware of sin in a fellow Christian’s life, and I do nothing, I myself become guilty before God of sin against God because I have disobeyed His command. Now, we need to take this to heart because sometimes we hold back, and we are aware of sin in a Christian’s life but we just can’t bring ourselves to do anything. It’s not my business. He may not think I have any right to neb into his life. I can find all kind of reasons to hold back, but the bottom line is Christ commands me to go and reprove him in private. If I don’t, then I am guilty of refusing to do what God tells me to do, and I have sinned.
So, our responsibility is to go and reprove him. That word “reprove” has the following meanings: to bring to light, to expose, to set forth, to point out something to someone, to convict or convince, to reprove or correct. In other words, I go with the intention of showing this person from the word of God that what they have done or are doing is in violation of God’s word and thus what is God’s will for them. I go to expose what they’re doing to them as sin. To convict them and confront them. Not because of my moral superiority or any other kind of superiority, but because of my love for them and the truth of the word of God.
This word, “to reprove,” is used of the Holy Spirit’s ministry in John 16:8, when the Holy Spirit comes, He will reprove or convict the world. So, really we become an instrument of the Holy Spirit. The one through whom the Holy Spirit will perform His work in convicting this fellow believer of the wrongness of their action. Titus, chapter 2, verse 15 says we are to do this with all authority, to reprove or convict with all authority.
I don’t come because I am a superior person. I don’t come in because I have a perfect life and they don’t. That’s not the issue. I come because they are clearly in violation of the word of God, and I come to correct them. I come along side to help them deal with this issue. It’s a similar idea to Galatians 6:1, where if you who are spiritual see one overcome with a fault, you come alongside him to restore him. That’s our desire, our goal. We come to confront them with the desire to restore them to a right relationship with God and a right behavior.
And you do this in private. Literally, between you and him alone. “Go and reprove him between you and him alone.” So, at this point, some say, I don’t know what to do, I better go talk to someone. No, I better go talk to them. Well, I don’t know that I’m the best to do that. You must be because God, in His sovereignty, has chosen to make you aware of the sin in that person’s life. So, you may be the very one that will be most effective, in spite of what you may think.
You know, much heartache, must discord, must gossip would be taken care of in the Church if we’d just follow this. You know, we sometimes look for ways to avoid that responsibility, but the scriptures clear, you go to them in private. If he listens, then you go and give a testimony at prayer meeting of what happened. No! The end of verse 15, “If he listens to you, you’ve won your brother.” You’ve done it in private. You may go confront him and say, I’ve become aware there is sin in your life. This is the sin. I’m here because I love you, I’m concerned for you, and the word of God says that what you’re doing is wrong. I’d like to help you deal with it. He says, I appreciate that, you know. I knew it was wrong. I’ve just let it go on, or I wasn’t thinking, or I, I, I just succumbed, whatever. He says, It is sin. I, I, I want to be done with it. Wonderful! Praise the Lord! You’ve won your brother. You’ve got him back on track. You’ve rescued him, if you will, from ruin if he had continued on that road.
The goal in discipline is always the restoration of the sinning Christian to a biblical position. That’s the goal. Just like the discipline in our home of our children is what? Is to correct their behavior, to bring their conduct in line with what it should be. That’s our goal here. Now, we’re not in a position to make them do penance, if you will. If they deal with it, it’s done, then on we go.
Verse 16, second step, If he does not listen to you, you have done your job. No! “If he doesn’t listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed.” Now, this is the difficult thing, is it not, in this whole process? If you knew for sure that this sinning Christian was going to say to you, put his arms around you and say to you, you don’t know how much I appreciate you having the courage to come and confront me about this. I really want to thank you. I’d do it every time! You know what I’m afraid of he’s going to say? Get out of here! Who gives you the right to come and neb your nose in my life? That he may reject what I have to say.
That means the discipline takes the next step so you get two or three witnesses to go with you. Remember, we’re not done until the sinning Christian is restored. That’s the goal. You take one or two with you. Again, this is given as a command. So, Christ commands us if we become aware of sin in a Christian’s life, we must go personally, privately. If they do not respond, willing to deal with the sin, then we are commanded again to take the next step, and that is to get one or two other believers to go with us to confront this person. These are witnesses. I take it they will be witnesses in two ways: They will join with me in witnessing to this person that his conduct is unbiblical and wrong; and they will also be witnesses against him if he does not change.
You see now what started out as just a little circle, this sinning Christian and me, now has gotten to be a little bigger circle. It includes the sinning Christian and me and one or two other Christians who join in testifying against him regarding the sinfulness of his conduct in light of the word of God. And the quote there is from Deuteronomy, chapter 19, verse 15, “At the mouth of two or three witnesses, every fact shall be established.” We are confirming the fact of true sin. Because if this is just a disagreement, and he demonstrates before these two witnesses, I haven’t really sinned. They said they saw me having a smoke in my garage, but the Bible doesn’t say, “thou shalt not smoke,” therefore, it’s a misunderstanding. And I appreciate that you think I shouldn’t smoke, and you’re concerned for my health, and you don’t think it’s a good testimony, but this is not a sinful action like immorality because the Bible does not address it. Well, these two or three witnesses, as mature believers, if there is an issue, would also be in a place to help resolve it. Hopefully, in the confrontation that takes place that has been settled very quickly and early.
Again, if he responds and says, “You know, when I was initially confronted I wasn’t willing to admit it sin. But before you three I, I don’t have any defense. You’re right, it’s been sin. I tried to argue that it wasn’t, I tried to avoid facing the reality, but you’re right. And I do want to repent of it, I want to be turned from it, I want to be done with it, I want a life that honors God.” Well, these three or four people can join together in prayer thanking God for His grace in restoring this wandering loved one. It’s over and it need go no further.
But verse 17, “If he refuses to listen to them” (to the witnesses you’ve brought), “tell it to the Church.” Now you note. Things are getting progressively more serious here and the circle is getting bigger. More people have become involved. From just two people, the sinning Christian and the one confronting him, to three or four people joined together as witnesses against the sinning Christian, now it has to come to the body of believers.
At Indian Hills there are two steps taken here. The Board of Elders are the representative leaders of this congregation. So in this local body, it is brought before the Elders and the Elders are made aware of the situation. And they, as representatives of the body do what they can to make a contact to confront this person about the gravity of their situation, usually, at least a member from the Board of Elders, sometimes two. Elders attempt to have a contact with this person to confirm the situation and let them know of the gravity of the situation.
The second step here is the body, as a whole, is made aware of the situation. Now, you note in verse 17, “If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the Church. If he refuses to listen even to the Church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax gatherer.” So, what happens is the Church is made aware of the sin. The fact that this fellow believer is in rebellion against God, has been involved in sin. I take it, the Church now, the body joins together in prayer and in confronting this person, because the middle of verse 17 says, “if he refuses to listen even to the Church.” So here you have the weight, if you will, of the body speaking to this person. Not just one person telling him he’s in sin. Not just two or three persons joining together confronting him with his sin. Now you have the Elder’s and you have the body of believers all joined together in agreement in confronting him with his sin.
This is to make an impression and an impact upon him. It’s done for love. This is a very, very serious situation. Sin is always serious. Sin in the life of a believer is very serious matter before God. It must be dealt with. We must take our responsibility as members of God’s family seriously in this matter. So, it’s brought before the Church. If the person responds, turns from his sin, then we rejoice and praise the Lord together. There’s nothing further to be done.
But the middle of verse 17, “If he refuses to listen even to the Church” and the awful thing about sin particularly as we have indulged in it over time, we become callous toward it. We close off ourselves even to the impact of the testimony of the body of Christ against our behavior. “And if he refuses to listen even to the Church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax gatherer.” A way of saying here you have nothing to do with him. The Jews would have understood this very well. You disassociate yourselves from them. You are not involved with them in familiar discourse, in a social activity, in friendship ways.
It doesn’t mean you won’t talk to them. It doesn’t mean if I pass them on the street I wouldn’t say hello. But, if he says, hey, let’s go to a ball game together. I say, I’m sorry I can’t do that. You’re under the discipline of the body. This is a serious matter. I would love to be together again, to do things with you but I love you too much to do that until you’ve dealt with the sin in your life. Maybe this is the time to do it. I mean, we want to take advantage of the opportunity to pursue this with people. Remember, our goal is to restore them, not to act like we are superior to them.
So, they’re cut off. They’re removed from the fellowship of the body. A couple of passages we need to run through quickly. Look over in 1 Corinthians, chapter 5. 1 Corinthians, chapter 5. Look at verse 5. Here you have a professing believer in the church at Corinth who was involved in immorality. The church hadn’t done anything about it. Paul rebukes them strongly for that. Verse 4, “In the name of our Lord Jesus, when you were assembled and I with you in spirit with the power of our Lord Jesus,” (and we’ll see that in a moment coming up in Matthew 18) “I have decided to deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of his flesh that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.”
Verse 11, “I actually wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother,” (if anyone is called a brother, professes to be a believer) “if he should be an immoral person, covetous, an idolater, a reviler, a drunkard, a swindler, not even to eat with such a one.” Verse 13, “Those who are outside, God judges.” In other words, I’m not talking about anything to do with unbelievers who drink or unbelievers who are immoral. God hasn’t called us to exercise discipline on the unbelievers. “But remove the wicked man from among yourselves,” verse 13. So you see what is entailed when you cut them off. You treat them as a tax gatherer, a Gentile. You cut them off. You don’t associate with them, verse 11. Now, that’s hard sometimes because some of you are dealing with someone who’s been a very close friend, talking about members of the body here. You know, you feel sometimes uncomfortable. Well, I don’t want to do that but it’s for their good.
“Deliver such a one to Satan,” verse 5 of 1 Corinthians 5 said tells you what that means is you have removed him, put him outside the fellowship of the body. We’ll talk about this a little bit later, but what you do is put him in the realm of Satan where he’s cut off from the fellowship of believers. And that will be further in the process of discipline, as we’ll see in a moment.
This delivering one to Satan, 1 Timothy 1:20, just jot it down, says the same thing. Paul did that with some individuals regarding doctrinal sin, 2 Thessalonians, chapter 3, verse 6. 2 Corinthians 3:6, “Now we command you brethren in the name of our Lord Jesus, that you keep aloof from every brother who leads an unruly life and not according to the tradition you have received from us.” “Leads an undisciplined life.” Here you’re talking about lazy Christians who won’t work. Down to verse 14, “If anyone does not obey our instruction in this letter, take special note of that man, do not associate with him so that he may be put to shame.” He ought to be humiliated. He ought to be ashamed when he thinks all these Christians have joined together in, declaring that this is sin and I love my sin more than I love the Lord and more than I love them.
“Yet do not regard him as an enemy but admonish him as a brother.” I say, he’s not my enemy. I love him. I won’t be social with him in the sense of having him over for dinner or going to his house for dinner or going to a game together or any of that, but I’d love to sit down and help him deal with the sin in his life. I’m available to do that any time. And I want him to know that, and I might drop him a note, periodically to know, I’m still praying for you. Still love you. Still miss your fellowship and friendship. Looking forward to the day. This is a brother. You know it’s like the children in our family. Sometimes we have to discipline severely, but we rejoice, look forward to the day, what? When they’ll be restored to right relationship with the family. That’s our goal. All of these settings.
You know, we sometimes begin to rationalize and think we’ve got better ideas than God. We come up with Plan B. We start to think like this, what good is it to disassociate ourselves from a sinning Christian? Wouldn’t it be better to keep them as part of the body? Wouldn’t it be better to maintain our contact so that we could help them? Well, no! How do you know? Because God says this is best. You know, when I think that I have a better idea than God, I’m off track, don’t you think?
So, number one, God tells me the discipline is for the good of the one being disciplined. This is for his good as he experiences the seriousness of it. There’s a second reason for church discipline and that is the purity of the body. 1 Corinthians, chapter 5, verse 6; Galatians, chapter 5, verse 9, warns that if sin is not dealt with it will spread. Know what happens when sinful behavior is not dealt with? We are declaring within the body that this is okay. Pretty soon, someone else does it, someone else does it, someone else does it.
What do our kids do in our home? You tell your, one of your children to do something, and he says, no, I don’t think I will and you don’t do anything. You tell the other child to do something, and he says, no, I don’t think I’ll do that, and you say, I’m going to discipline you if you don’t. He says, why? You didn’t discipline so-and-so. So, you say, oh, you’re right. I won’t discipline either one of you. Pretty soon you have an undisciplined home, everything is okay.
That happens in the church. The church thinks it’s being loving. We’re being caring. I mean, we’re loving these people back to the Lord. We’re not disciplining them.
When we think we have a better idea than God, were no longer God’s servants. No longer in a position to be used of Him in the accomplishing of His purposes. So, it becomes necessary to disassociate ourselves for the good of that sinning Christian and for maintaining the purity of the body of Christ.
Come back to Matthew, chapter 18, verse 18, Christ tells us there is real authority in discipline. We’ve sometimes, and I’ve sometimes had the question, what good does it do? Well, number one, it’s good for us because we’ve been obedient. The authority behind all of this is from heaven. “Truly, truly,” verse 18 says, “whatever you shall bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven. Whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven.” The idea here is we are representing God. The will of heaven is being carried out here in this confrontation that has taken place. We are reflecting the mind and will of God.
So, in the matter of forgiveness and unforgiveness, we represent God in this. This is not the Roman Catholic idea of being able to absolve a person from sin. This is God’s pattern for dealing with sin in the life of a Christian and our being involved in the process of helping them deal with it. And when a person refuses to deal with their sin, and the church takes this stand, it has the authority of heaven behind that stand. So, an important verse here, “shall have been bound, shall have been loosed.” And I take it that means we are reflecting the will of heaven, the will of God in this matter. This is not an independent authority so the church can run around now dictating in people’s lives. We have independent authority, and we have a magisterium in this church and I’m the pope of that magisterium and we decide what’s right and wrong in your life. No, we’re talking about sin and the pattern of having to deal with sin in the life of a person who professes to be a believer.
Now, we may have people who attend this congregation, and they make no profession to be a believer and we make no attempt to discipline them. We deal with those who are called brethren, who profess to belong to Jesus Christ. Then we have His authority to exercise discipline in His family. I take it, this is part of the process in verses 12-14 of chapter 18. Of bringing back wandering sheep in the will and plan of God.
Verse 19, “Again, I say to you, if two or three, if two of you agree on earth about anything that they may ask, it shall be done for them by My Father who is in heaven.” I take it the reference in the context here is to verse 16, “By the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every fact be established.” “If you agree.” This agreement has God’s full support and He’s responsible for the effectiveness of the discipline. You know, it’s like me sharing the gospel. I’m not responsible for the salvation of that soul, I am responsible for faithfully and clearly presenting the truth of God to that person. I need to be careful I don’t cross that line. I say, well, discipline doesn’t do any good. We’ve done it on a number of people who haven’t turned around, so therefore what good is it? Well, now I’ve taken God’s responsibility into my hands. My responsibility is to exercise the discipline. God’s responsibility is to deal with their heart from that point on.
So we often quote this verse out of its context here. The context of verse 19 is the agreement regarding the sin in the life of this believer and the necessary discipline and God stands with them. “For where two or three are gathered together in My name, there I am in their midst.” Now, I take it again, this is in the context of discipline because Peter’s going to pick up in verse 21 and wants to know about this subject of forgiveness. And what about when a Christian has sinned and then repents and turns around and you forgive him, how many times do you do that? So, we’re still in the context of discipline and forgiveness. “Where two or three are gathered together in My name, there I am in their midst.” We’re assured of the presence and authority of Christ in this process.
This expression, “in their midst”, it’s the same expression used in Revelation, chapter 1, verse 13, where Christ stands in the midst of the lampstands which represent His churches. He is there to exercise judgment and discipline and correction as He evaluates those churches. Here He is in the midst of His people again. This is a serious matter. It’s not just a group of people who have gotten together and are doing something. The living Christ, who is the Lord of the Church, is joined with these witnesses in the discipline that is taking place.
Now, in this context we go on to the subject of forgiveness, which is important. But I want to say that this is as far as we can go as a church with the discipline but that doesn’t mean the discipline of God is over. God steps in from this point and continues the discipline of this child. That’s why it’s important that we follow this process so that God has opportunity to work in this person’s life. This person has opportunity to respond to the work of God through His people. Because if he is a believer and continues on this road, then God will personally intervene in more serious ways.
Back in 1 Corinthians, chapter 11 in connection with our communion service we read. Verse 30, because of sin in the life of some of the Corinthians, the lives of some of the Corinthians, verse 30, “For this reason, many of you, many among you are weak and sick and a number sleep. But if we judged ourselves rightly we should not be judged. But when we are judged, we are disciplined by the Lord in order that we may not be condemned along with the world.” You see what is happening? God will bring weakness, physical illness, and even physical death in the life of a sinning child. He is serious about this matter of sin in the life of his children, lives of his children.
We think, oh, well, we disciplined. Didn’t nothing, nothing happened. Remember one person who testified to this who was restored after discipline said, I was miserable every day out there in the world. They had been cut off to the fellowship of believers. Furthermore, they felt the pressure of the Lord, the physical deterioration and ultimately the experience of death. It was their testimony that it took that discipline for me to finally come to the brink of repentance as I confronted the reality of death, and the Lord did take this person.
God is serious. Paul says, under the inspiration of the Spirit, “Some of you at Corinth are experiencing weakness, some of you physical illness, some have experienced physical death under the chastening and disciplining hand of the Lord.” We don’t have time, because of our time now, but James, chapter 5, verses 14-16, verses 19-20, would fit in this. 1 John, chapter 5, verse 16, “If any of you see a brother committing a sin, not to death,” that context.
You know, Hebrews, chapter 12, says God disciplines all His children and if you are without discipline you don’t belong to God. That’s a similar thing that’s said in verse 32 of 1 Corinthians 11. “We are disciplined by the Lord in order that we may not be condemned along with the world.” If you’re without discipline, Hebrews tells us, you don’t belong to God. So, some people have been disciplined by this church because they profess to be believers and they’re living in sin.
I remember talking with one individual, and I said to him, we’re going to discipline you because you profess to be a believer, but I want to be honest as your Pastor and a person who’s been your friend. I have seen no evidence of the fact that you have truly been born again by the power of God. My concern for you is your eternal destiny. You know, some people have been disciplined and they go on with their life and nothing seems to happen, and they perhaps get rich and live long life, and we say, what good did it do? Well maybe we need to consider that. The person I shared with you who shared their testimony about their experience after having been disciplined, they were disciplined with some other people for similar sin at the same time. Said, I went out there with them and this person’s testimony was I really don’t think they were ever born again, because they were comfortable out there. I never was! They indulged and enjoyed themselves. I indulged and was miserable every moment. There’s a difference.
A person who’s under the discipline of the church and persists in the sin and nothing seems to take place, may be testifying to the fact that they don’t belong to God. “If you are without discipline, you are illegitimate children,” Hebrews says. You really don’t belong to God but that’s in the Lord’s hands. We discipline on the basis of their profession. That’s all we have. A person claims to be a believer and has been part of this fellowship, then, in love, we discipline them.
We mentioned Proverbs 13:24, “He who spares his rod, hates his son. He who loves him disciplines him diligently.” Proverbs 23, verses 13 and 14, “Do not hold back discipline from the child. Although you beat him with the rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with the rod and deliver his soul from death.” And I know some people react against that and spankings today are taken to be child abuse. When my Dad told me I was going to get a good beating I didn’t think he was going to knock my teeth out, break my bones, but I thought there might be some brilliantly red spots on my body. The appropriate parts of my body. Discipline is painful. Church discipline is meant to be painful. We don’t delight in causing pain. We are not looking to be destructive and ruin the person. We are looking to be helpful and reclaim the person. That’s why, we, as a Church, follow the pattern of discipline amongst ourselves and do it as an evidence of our love.